speechless

i’m speechless

at a loss for words

my extensive vocabulary fails me right now

i ran out of things to say

prayers to pray

confessions and affirmations to make known

so I stayed up past midnight silent

eating forbidden Oreo cookies and drinking tea

alone with just my thoughts

reading a book I bought

funny how the tv  my friend gave me stopped working today

for no apparent reason

the light stays red like something is wrong inside

as if it knew

like a short

or a fuse is out

and it will cost $200 to fix but how

can anyone put a price tag on something that is priceless

a life

a heart

a soul

a body

that is broken

i wonder why i suddenly feel like hitting somebody

when those who claim to know so much could be so wrong

and be so powerless to save

how would any of them feel to be told that everything will be alright

and wake up the next day to find out that they were all wrong

i hate the world right now

and all of its lies

God please help me to understand

why

after all of these years and millions of dollars

they still can’t get it right

how many have died waiting for a cure

to this disease called cancer

the crab that crawls into lives uninvited

paying no rent yet claims squatter’s rights

determined to take eminent domain over every avenue and street

while we wait

and hope

have faith that God will intervene with His hand

if he should choose to trouble the waters

and save

my friend