Today , , ,

Today . . .

I will remember you

I will open my journal

I will write about you

I will get distracted

I will write about something else

I will get bored

I will go back to writing about you

I will cry

I will get angry

I will rip the pages from my book and throw them away

I will call you

I will let the phone ring

I will say nothing when you answer

I will hang up

I will take a walk in the rain

I will think of you

I will go back to my journal

I will write about you

I will save it this time

For Robert

 

I felt the vibrations of your ink

your pen shook earth

shaking volumes of words

from off the shelf

I saw the pages falling

with letters scattering randomly like dandelion seeds

tapping the fertile soil

of my creative womb

and re-birthing poetically

into new cipher

moving gracefully

to an uncertain end

the muses from Langston’s porch

were pleased

they enjoyed the vibe

the pickled okra

and impromptu walks

the sweltering ride on the A train from

Lennox and 125th

to Nostrand avenue

the surprise mango tea

and baby red velvet

Brooklyn’s finest keeping vigilant watch

on surreptitious corner activities

where everybody is somebody

even the nobodies

even me

walking

looking

searching

finally finding peace

when we sat on Langston’s stoop

and played

like children

running after verbs and adjectives

down the sidewalk

duck duck goose

you’re it

no more chalk lines

only pens to paper

writing our letters carefully

and sending  prayers up

to the universe

we climbed up Langston’s steps

playing hopscotch

with words that dreamed

of what tomorrow would bring

hoping for better

leaning on the patina rails

looking up into the heavens

as the grime from the sidewalk

settled on our shoelaces

and we remembered that day

on sacred ground.

i would...

 

I would follow you anywhere

be your queen in shining armor

ready to defend your honor

when you think no one has your back

in this upside down world

riding on my horse ladystyle blazin’

like maid marian

with locs flowing behind me

coming to your rescue

in medieval fashion

as you gaze in wonder at my bravery

your wonderful wonder woman who

knows everything about you

keeping your heart

safely in my hands

and I know I’m dreaming

but just in case you wanted to know

I would follow you anywhere

be your best friend

who stays in your corner

always having a listening ear

and a shoulder to rest on

stay at your side no matter what

your ride or die chick

your honey over the moon

and the stars

your forever and a day

yes

I would follow you anywhere

if you would only

ask...

heart to heart

perhaps he lacks the courage to love
or maybe his emotions are unavailable
finding out takes too much energy
... to waste
on recycling love that goes nowhere
giving your heart away
to an empty space
an unfeeling wall
that will only make you bitter
why do you continue
to offer yourself
as disposable…
a throwaway girl whose worth is in her panties
when his only interest
is in what they contain
he doesn’t think of you
as a life companion
you’re nothing more than a whore
he will never pay for
wake up…
smell the coffee
and realize
your value
is more
than just sex
your sacred space
is only for the one who will love you
completely
and not to be given away
for free
for attention
or out of desperation
shake yourself from the dust
see yourself as a queen
stop settling for crumbs
find the whole loaf
and sit at the table
with your king

she hides it well

she hides it well

words in her back pocket

stashed away in closets

pushed aside and stored in boxes

to be filed at a later date

she learned early that dressing the part makes up

for what was lacking inside

and she hides it well

skirting around the real story

quickly changing the subject

when the topic gets too intense

she looks for the nearest exit

and makes her escape

she hides it well

covering her scent

to throw off a would-be pursuer

diving into the water to confuse even the most skillful hunter

when she is the prey

never getting caught

or trapped as she calls it

staying free

and undomesticated

no one’s slave or property

alone is where she remains

and although she cries inside

she hides it well

 

 

 

 

 

 

if

If you do
because you have to
but don't want to...
give
because it's expected
but you can't afford it...
go
even though you would rather be
someplace else...
then, don't.
Forced behavior that's not from the heart
is like violence
and rape of the soul
that gives rise to bastard children of resentment
from the seeds of iniquity
planted in the womb of hatred
spreading like a disease that pollutes the land
and carries death to its residents like the waters of Katrina.
So if you have to...
don't want to...
can't...
or won't...
please don't.

moon dancing

let’s go dancing on the moon

all by ourselves

moving and grooving to the vibration of the stars

catching stardust between our toes

let’s jump from galaxy to galaxy

sky trip above the clouds

and take a lunar expedition

let’s see if there are really any other people out there

in the universe who believe in being free

dancing on the moon with no gravity to hold us down

seeing earth at a distance

from God’s view

let’s go dancing on the moon

all by ourselves

moving and grooving

to the vibration

of

the

stars…

Day #18...poetics

word and sound

life and love

giving and receiving

connecting and separating

near and distant

alike and opposite

old and new

spirits and souls

bodies converging and complementing

minds exploding and melting

brevity and longevity

full and empty

forgiving and reliving

poetics

love poem # 3

i left a poem on your doorstep

wrapped in newspaper and tied with rough string

hoping you would read between the thoughts and see into my soul before throwing it away

or perhaps recycling the thoughts

mixed with compost and old coffee grounds to make the flowers grow.

i left a poem on your doorstep

filled with honesty about the joys of love that could never be

only imaginary fantasies between you and me

from my heart into your hands

created by my ink on colored paper

rainbow wishes floating above the clouds

freely giving and receiving

until forever

i left a poem on your doorstep

and waited

silently wondering what you would do

if you knew it was from me

just for you…

just a poem...

on your doorstep

waiting…

she keeps waiting for him to change

his ways

his heart

his mind…

do an about face and turn his desire towards her

but he won’t

so she keeps waiting and hoping

even praying a prayer that cannot be answered

because she can’t see

that he

is

not

the

one…

Get Out

if he hits

with words…actions…or fists

      Get out.

let the law deal with his problems...

   his problem is not you.

and just in case you didn’t know

assault with those deadly weapons

is a crime against God, nature & the universe

and finding 1,000 ways

to stay in a relationship

            that might kill somebody

especially when that somebody might be you

is a death-wish that will come true.

don’t believe the hype…          

no matter what anyone says

it’s not your fault.

                abusers always blame others

       and can’t see themselves

excuses are their reasons to live

no matter who dies in the end.        

 so get out while you can

               save yourself and your life

 home is where the heart lives

   but the heart needs a safe place to abide...

 and if you have to run

  Get out

call for help

 look for shelter in the dark

an outstretched hand…

a willing confidante…

 or an anchor in the storm.

you keep holding on

hoping things will change

and afraid that he won’t

not knowing what to do

if you don’t Get out…before it’s too late

it’s OK to be afraid

   but it’s not OK to hurt

           to kill

           or be killed

the law of the jungle

doesn’t apply at home

living like a trapped animal

because you’re too afraid to be alone…

Get out.